Potential Kitchen Disaster of the Day

And how are you lovelies doing on this fine day?(I don’t really give a damn) I thought I’d grace you all with a recipe today. I have other things to write about, but they usually involve me reading about some dumb fucker who makes me want to find a unicorn, cut off its horn, and use it for evil. So I decided to take a break. Don’t I DESERVE a break (from doing absolutely nothing)?! DON’T I?? Well no, but fuck it. I’m gonna take one anyway 😀

I believe I told you that some friends of mine had a birthday coming up and I was going to make dinner and cake for them. Don’t you remember? See, you never listen to me! Anyway, I decided not to make the fondant covered cakes after all. I thought about it and decided it would’ve been a waste. Fondant makes it easier to decorate a cake, but it doesn’t really add any flavor. So I did the next best thing. That’s right, I made cupcakes that look like monkeys.

To start with, you’ll need some chocolate cupcakes. This is a pretty good recipe for a cake that’s not too sickeningly sweet. I didn’t use the red food coloring though. I just didn’t see the point, really. If you want to use a box cake mix, I won’t judge you. I just recommend reading the ingredients and getting the one with the least amount of shit you can’t pronounce in it.

You’ll also need some chocolate butter cream frosting(it doesn’t have to be domino’s). After your cupcakes are COMPLETELY cooled, you’re going to frost them with a thin layer of the butter cream. Reserve about a quarter of the frosting for later. You’ll need it for decorating.

To make your cupcakes look like monkeys you will need:
Vanilla wafer cookies, either store-bought or homemade
M&Ms, or something similar
peanut butter cookies shaped like peanuts, optional

Cut off about ¼ of the vanilla wafers so that there is one flat side. Place one on the bottom part of the cupcake

This is going to be where the mouth and nose go.

If you’re going to use the peanut butter cookies, cut them in half and stick them on either side of the vanilla wafer. These are the ears. I usually don’t bother them though.

Next, put the M&Ms where you want the eyes to be. Don’t be afraid to apply some pressure to get them to stay on(THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID!).

To make the nose, mouth and eyeballs, take a plastic zip top bag and poke a hole in one corner. I use a toothpick. You can cut a small bit off the corner if you don’t have toothpicks. Put dots on the M&Ms for the eyes, 2 dots on the top part of the vanilla wafer for the nose and a line for the mouth (if you couldn’t figure this out, you have issues my friend).

Unfortunately, I don’t have a working camera right now so I can’t show you how mine came out. They should look something like this:

Don’t be afraid to get creative with the facial expressions. It’s all about having fun with it (that’s also what she said).

I hope you’ve enjoyed this latest PKD. If not, well, you can kiss my ass. No one held a gun to your head to force you to read it. Or did they..?

Enjoy biznotchezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!

7 Responses to Potential Kitchen Disaster of the Day

  1. writechic says:

    Monkeys!!!!!!!!!!! 😀

    Those cupcakes kick ass.

  2. oso says:

    If only after 9/11 Bush had asked his advisers what he should do, and received a chorus of

    “Make cupcakes that look like monkeys!!”

    Reminds me of the slogan when I was growing up in the 60’s-Make cupcakes that look like monkeys, not war!

    take it light bluecollarmommma !

  3. hey BCM!! loved those cupcakes you made for me and 217… awesomeness embodied… may have to try the recipe

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