What in the Holy Hell…?

Today I was having trouble thinking of something to post. I thought, maybe I’d post something about Mel Gibson’s craziness. (NOTE: “…but you will blow me first” is going to replace “that’s what she said”) But we all know Mel is batshit crazy. Then I was going to post something about the teabaggers being the complete opposite of christian. But that’s not new to anyone either. Then I remembered noticing one of those annoying ads on a website recently. It was for vagina tightening spray. So, I decided to google it… Holy fuck nuts!

The ad I saw was for Instant Virgin vagina rejuvenating spray(link slightly NSFW). My favorite part was this lovely testimonial:

Ive had my fare share of guys, and it was starting to take its toll on my vagina. Now I can rest assured that every time it will be nice and tight.

– Jill, USA

I’m assuming that by “fare share” she means she’s a prostitute. So, yes, I can see how that would take its toll on your chocha. I don’t think you’ve got the right spray, though. You might want to try this instead. Disinfect to protect, betch.

I guess the creams and sprays are safer than Vaginal Rejuvenation surgery. And they are way less expensive. The creams and sprays are anywhere from $10 to $130. The surgery? Between $4500 and $9000. Seriously! Do you really need a designer vagina that badly?

I understand getting work done on your nether regions for medical reasons. I do think women should take charge of their sex lives and try to have the best experiences possible. There are all kinds of other things you can try before deciding to go under the knife. And if the only reason you’re going under the knife is because someone told you your vag looks funny, then you need to examine the quality of the sexual partners you’re choosing. If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

I don’t think I’ve ever used the word vagina, or its synonyms, as often as I have here. Nice!

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